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What it is like to be 'Partnered with a Survivor' with David Mandel and Ruth Stearns Mandel

This very special episode Standing Strong Together we hear from the team from Safe & Together Institute and host of Partnered with a Survivor Podcast, David and Ruth.

Partnered Pod and Safe and Together Institute that is a friends and family guide for both victims/survivors and perpetrators that can be very useful for people.

These podcasts are a reflection of Ruth & David’s on-going conversations which are both intimate and professional and touch on complex topics like how systems fail victims and children, how victims experience those systems, and how children are impacted by those failures. Their discussions delve into how society views masculinity and violence, and how internationalists such as cultural beliefs, religious beliefs and unique vulnerabilities impact how we respond to abuse and violence. These far-ranging discussions offer an insider look into how we navigate the world as professionals, as parents and as partners. During these podcasts, David & Ruth challenge the notions which keep all us from moving forward collectively as systems, as cultures and as families into safety, nurturing and healing relationship.

Earlier this year the Standing Strong Together team attended the Safe and Together Institute conference and had the pleasure to spend a lot of time yarning with David and Ruth about many topics impacting survivors and their families

In this special broadcast David and Ruth offer a very personal look at relationship dynamics when one partner is a survivor. In response to a request from a survivor from Australia earlier this year at their Melbourne Conference to explore this topic, David & Ruth share their personal challenges and rewards of navigating historical abuse.

What does living with and partnering with a survivor really look like emotionally and behaviorally?

How does one learn to honor and respect the emotional implications historical abuse has inside relationships?

Ruth and David talk about • how David learned about and honored the impact of Ruth's earlier abuse in their relationship and co-parenting • how Ruth's openness about her trauma and her advocacy for the voices of survivors has deepened and enriched David's work. • strategies for both survivors and for those who live, love and work with them about how to navigate trauma, trauma content, trauma emotions and trauma behaviors in a healthy and responsible way that improves trust and collaboration. • how David's personal internal work assisted him in learning the principles of how to partner with survivors

Please note some of the topics discussed in the episodes are deeply personal and sensitive, which may be difficult for some people.

If you or anyone you know need support please contact

1800RESPECT Lifeline 1311 14 No to Violence or in an emergency call 000

For more Partnered with a Survivor podcasts or information on the Safe & Together Institute please visit


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